Writers by default are ‘wordsmiths,’ therefore it’s important to keep up with language as it evolves. And yesterday, the people who publish the Merriam-Webster dictionary announced the inclusion of more than 100 words to the newest version of their dictionary. Here are some highlights:
Cardioprotective (1984): serving to protect the heart.Frenemy (1977): one who pretends to be a friend but is actually an enemy.Green-collar (1990): of, relating to, or involving actions for protecting the natural environment.Locavore (2005): one who eats foods grown locally whenever possibleSock puppet (1959): a false online identity used for deceptive purposesStaycation (2005): a vacation spent at home or nearbyWaterboarding (2004): an interrogation technique in which water is forced into a detainee’s mouth and nose so as to induce the sensation of drowningWebisode (1996): an episode esp. of a TV show that may or may not have been telecast but can be viewed at a Web site.
Okay, let’s see what sentence we can concoct using some of these?
“My frenemy doctor was claiming to be acting in a cardioprotective manner on my behalf, but I surmised he was nothing but a sock puppet, so instead of traveling abroad, I faked a staycation, then shot a webisode of me waterboarding his sorry ass.”
Your turn.
The guy that made the webisode about a greencollar, locavore pushing his "new" cardioprotective vitamins – he was actually an Iranian sockpuppet who was waterboarded on his "staycation" in Cuba by his bestest frenemy from college! Can you believe it!
In his last email he called me a Frenemy, and of course, I went into total cardioprotective mode because my little heart felt like someone was waterboarding the hell out of it, but then he text me to say that his cousin, AKA, the loose unit lovacore guy, who was having a staycation in his house, went all sock puppet on him and sent that nasty email, so as you can imagine my day was a webisode from hell, but anyway, I gotta go 'cause I need to go plant a tree and build up my green-collar points before someone sees me in my new Hummer.