More biting satire from The Hollywood Roaster: “The Top 30 Day Jobs For Aspiring Writers (And Why)”. Here’s a sampling:

30. Waiter – Many writers have been discovered while waiting tables in LA. You, on the other hand, will be working at an Applebee’s in Little Rock, but you never know, right?

28. Babysitter – It lets you spend time with people who whine almost as much as you.

21. Proctologist – Succeeding as a writer involves an intimate knowledge of kissing people’s asses, so you might as well make sure as many of those assholes as possible are in good working order.

20. Security Guard – Unlike the 32 scripts you’ve registered with the WGA, you might actually get to protect something people want to steal.

18. Crossing Guard – If you get lucky, the agent who rejected your query might wander into your intersection, and that’s when you strike!

16. Starbucks Employee – It just feels right.

Many more where that came from. THR even asks you to add some other jobs for writers-in-waiting he might have missed – so go here and bring the funny.